Four of this week’s stories come down to the same thing: a symptom that doesn’t match the picture someone was taught to look for.
Nearly 90% of women with severe sleep apnea aren’t getting treated
You may think everyone with sleep apnea snores. That’s what doctors were taught to look for, back when this was considered a man’s condition. Women don’t always fit the stereotype — they may show up with fatigue, insomnia, headaches, anxiety, brain fog, and generally terrible sleep instead. By one estimate, nearly 90% of women with severe sleep apnea are undiagnosed or undertreated.
Which matters because untreated sleep apnea increases your risk for heart disease, stroke, and type 2 diabetes.
What to ask: If you’re exhausted despite supposedly sleeping, ask whether you should be tested for sleep apnea — especially if you also have headaches, insomnia, teeth grinding, frequent nighttime bathroom trips, or restless legs.
Menopause may not look the same in autistic women
Autistic women often went undiagnosed because autism research focused heavily on boys and men.
And now we discover menopause research hasn’t exactly been overflowing with autistic women either. Shocking.
The limited research suggests menopause may intensify sensory sensitivity, sleep problems, emotional regulation, and executive functioning challenges.
What to ask: If you’re autistic and suddenly struggling more with executive functioning, emotional regulation, sleep, or sensory issues, ask whether perimenopause or menopause could be contributing.
Those recurring UTIs may not be UTIs at all
A urinalysis can show inflammation. A urine culture tells you whether bacteria are actually growing.
That matters, because women sent to a specialty clinic after repeated UTI symptoms and negative cultures frequently turned out to have something else going on — hormonal inflammation, pelvic floor problems.
Burning, urgency, and bladder pain are real. They just aren’t automatically a UTI.
What to ask: Was my urine culture positive for bacteria? If not, could this be GSM, another hormone-related change, pelvic floor dysfunction, or a medication I’m taking?
Cisgender or transgender, we all make hormones. And they do a lot more than make babies.
Hormones are having a moment. Estrogen. Testosterone. HRT. Gender-affirming hormone therapy.
But despite all the arguing about who should be taking which hormone, most of us were taught remarkably little about what hormones actually do.
They affect your brain, bones, heart, muscles, metabolism, sleep, and sexual function — among other things. And researchers are still learning what changing hormone levels mean for both cisgender and transgender people over a lifetime.
So, no, hormones are not just about reproduction and hot flashes.
What to ask: If you’re taking hormones — for menopause or gender affirmation — ask what they may be affecting beyond the symptoms you’re treating, and what should be monitored as you get older.
The FDA heard you about those missing patches
If finding your estrogen patch has started to feel like a scavenger hunt, apparently enough of you complained.
The FDA says it’s working with all six U.S. manufacturers to get more estradiol patches on the market.
They aren’t officially listed by the FDA as being in shortage, but that doesn’t mean women aren’t having trouble finding them. In a survey of 8,000 women by menopause telehealth company Midi, 44% said they had trouble filling their prescription. Of those, 11% stopped HRT rather than find an alternative.
What to ask: Tell your doctor if you can’t find your usual patch and ask what alternatives would work for you. And ask your pharmacist to check whether another location has it in stock.
Caregiving can become a full-time job without anyone announcing the promotion
First you’re picking up groceries. Then you’re managing appointments. Then medications. Eventually you’re helping someone bathe, dress, or get around the house.
It’s called “caregiver creep” — caregiving responsibilities accumulating so gradually that you may not realize how much you’re doing until you’re doing all of it.
The answer is not becoming more efficient at doing everything yourself.
What to ask: At your loved one’s Medicare Annual Wellness Visit, ask for an assessment of the daily activities they need help with. Then ask what community programs, benefits, or paid services could take some of those jobs off your plate.
That’s your list for the next time someone says, ‘Any questions?’
Know someone in the “wait, what the hell is happening” years? Forward this to her.
See you next Friday. — Trista